wow.

I am not even going to try and summarize this past year or so since I last blogged. What matters is how I am now, and not even I know how I am. I can give facts though.

1. This time last year, my FEV1* numbers were at 59.2% of normal. Now they are 52%, which is better then the decline from 2009-2010.
2. I have cried more times in the past two weeks then I have the past two years.
3. At the moment I have 7 nieces and nephews and 4 more who I consider my nieces/nephew.
4. I really want a child of my own.

I have felt the want for a child of my own for years now but never, ever has it been this bad.

I think it has to do with all the new babies in the family. My sister just had her third child, a baby girl named Madison. My distant cousin is pregnant and ready to pop. My aunt has a baby who is now nine months old, a little boy named Braydon James. 

I brought up the subject with my boyfriend who told me very firmly no. When i explained why I didn't want to wait the 7 years its going to take to finish school, he turned that into a maybe, I will think about it. Hes scared that hes going to be a bad father. I dont think he will be though. 

On top of all that, i am still fundraising for the Great strides walk to benifit the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation. I dont know exactly how im going to fund raise though.